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About Naples

So sexual-massage, yeah? It’s like a massage, but spicy, innit. Them hands ain’t just kneadin’ ya back - they’re goin’ *places*, fam. Little-known fact - back in ancient times, them Chinese emperors was gettin’ these rubs to “balance their chi” or summat. Probs just an excuse to get freaky, haha! Makes me laff thinkin’ about some posh git in a robe tryna play it cool while he’s all oiled up.

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After that, I decide to stroll down to Via Dante. I’m feeling artsy, you know? I pop into this little gallery. The art is wild—like, abstract stuff that makes you go, “What even is that?” I’m standing there, trying to look all sophisticated, when the owner starts chatting me up. He’s super passionate about his work, and I’m just nodding, pretending to understand.

Insurance claims surge as residents return to flood-ravaged north Queensland properties